Monday, June 25, 2012

Assault with hot acid

So, of my 2 kids, the majority of the .... quirks belong to Piper. She had the rougher start to life, and is therefore saddled with more of the emotional and developmental baggage. Poor nutter.

There is one thing though, that belongs entirely to Odie.
Water

He is TERRIFIED of water. In all forms, at all times, for all reasons.

I use the same joke all the time, He seems to think it's hot hot acid that will burn and kill him slowly. Every time he hears water coming from whatever source he takes off like his ass is on fire, to hide deep in the depths of whatever blanket he can find. If I am holding him and dare to walk towards a water source (sink, shower, hose) he will start to breathe differently, his body goes stiff and he tries to climb up and over me to get away from it- even when the water is OFF.

He is totally mental.

The most entertaining, and frustrating, moment of dealing with this is when it's raining out and its time for a walk. Now, my little criminal is always game for a walk- he'll even hang in on a long hike that his little legs are struggling to keep up with. So we'll get him all geared up and open the door, only to see his face change completely from "YAY! WALK!" to "OH DEAR GOD WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!" He has been known to try to back out of his collar in an effort to not be scalded by the acid falling from the sky in the worlds attempt to kill him specifically.

'Cause you know, that happens.

I can't help but laugh every time. I know I shouldn't cause it's open mockery of his terror, but I can't help it. The same thing he runs to drink at the end of every day could also kill him if it touches him on the outside? It just defies logic. His face when he's that scared is just so damn cute too. It's hilarious.

When it's raining out, and we're going for a walk, I notice all the more the individual nature of each of my creatures.
Odie, convinced he's going to die, does his best to run between raindrops or rush to every protected spot on the path.
Piper reminds me of the kids who run out in galoshes specifically to jump in puddles. She loves it and/or doesn't even notice it.

Every now and again, she will pick up on Odie's panic and balk at going out, but if we do everything fast enough for her to not notice, she's game for getting wet and smelling new smells and getting wet again. It's so enthusiastic and adorable, it's hard not to laugh just as much at her as I am at Odie's sheer terror.

On regular days, it's just good to know if I ever want a moments peace I just turn on the water. Brushing my teeth sends him running. Washing my hands practically has him on the ceiling. The Hubs changing the water in the fish tank nearly has him at the emergency vet's office.

Good thing for him his master, The Hubs, has an irregular amount of sympathy for him and consoles him constantly. Also good for him the power of a blanket over the head really does work to block out the evil acid. Between those 2 things, he's protected, and we're very careful not to mess with that. The game isn't fun if there's no safe zone, after all.


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