Midnight Romps

Recently there's been a recurring crime committed in our house, and it might be the worst one yet:
The crime of waking me up in the middle of the night.

Now, you have to understand, I am not a 8 hrs or people get smacked kind of person. It's more of a 6-7 hrs and don't talk to me right away and everything will be fine. This is usually pretty straightforward- I wake up at 6, so asleep by 11- totally do-able.

The pattern gets broken by something happening at 3am...Like, for example, a dog barking and freaking out at a noise I can't hear. Or, maybe a dog having a bad dream and barking in her sleep. Or a dog trying to get comfortable and scratching and moving a ton of stuff and huffing and grunting.....
You know, just as an example.

So there have been several instances of this recently.
The first one was actually comedic- mainly 'cause it was the first one.
At approx 3:15 am  Odie starts barking - no growl warning, nothing, just a full tilt barking frenzy while staring at the wall that divides our bedroom from the front room of the house. This is pretty unusual for our little dude who loves to sleep. Enough so that we both shot out of bed- and the Hubs went to explore the front of the house thinking someone was trying to break in.
Turns out, nothing of the sort had happened- it was a massive cat fight happening on our front stoop (fur evidence was found all over the front yard the next day). Odie's terrier blood got riled when he heard it and he wanted IN the fight.
After finally calming down, and laughing at bit at the ridiculousness of it all, we all tried to fall back asleep. And tried and tried and tried. Almost 45 min later, I think I finally fell asleep. So there's an hour lost. Lovely. Felt that at 2pm the next day for sure.

Then, a couple of days later, it was Piper's turn. For some reason around 3am, she started walking around the room, and trying to get my attention by standing up on my side of the bed. There's really nothing quite as lovely as getting a paw in the face when you're dead asleep. No, really, it's great....
After I yelled at her and she walked around some more, pacing and grunting every once in a while, with no rhythm to it so that I couldn't adjust to it and fall back asleep. Time passed, we all went back to sleep.
Then 45 minutes later, as she slept on the floor next to me, Piper started to dream. When she dreams, occasionally she does this weird thing with her mouth that sounds a bit like she's smacking her lips. It's a strange jaw popping thing and you can't ignore it. So, I got to wake up again. This time, I felt the Hubs stir and knew he heard it to.
"You hear her? This is killing me"
"Yeah, bitch. *mumble*"
So, another 20-ish minutes of being awake for that one before I was able to fall back asleep.

Last night, yet again, 4 am rolls around and suddenly I'm awake. It's Piper again, trying very hard to get my attention. She stands up on the side of the bed and paws at my arm. She paces and huffs. She scratches at the floor mat that is her bed on my side of the room. She knocks the curtains around (a metallic sound of the rings of the curtain knocking on the curtain rod) and knocks things off the night table. Then stands up on the bed again. This went on for a good 45 minutes, ending almost in time for the Hubs alarm to go off for work. Thankfully he'd slept thru all Piper's noise, so he should be ok today. I had the joy of waking up and going for a run despite all the shenanigans that went on overnight. Right now it's 5:30pm and I am still able to spell my name and type, but I'm not sure how. I also am thankful to whoever invented spell check 'cause I'm giving it a workout right now.

These dogs have GOT to stop it with these middle of the night mayhem. I don't drink coffee..... Many more days of this and I will totally lose it and fall asleep at my desk.
ok, again.
If we're being honest here.

I love them both, I truly do, thats why I don't mind bitching and moaning about them here- 'cause I know I love them under all of it. But this waking me up business is getting very risky for everyone involved.

Consider this a warning, kiddos, a "fix it ticket" as it were. Fix it, or you're gonna be in a heap of trouble.

Revenge

Yesterday was Halloween.
The day when candy is the biggest goal in most kids lives. The night when wearing as little as possible and still having some sort of theme is the goal of most people in the mid-teens to 30 yrs old.

For Pet owners
(or pet parents if your one of those people)
It's a day to generate some truly humiliating photos of their pets in bizarre costumes.

Did I partake in this ritual of humiliation?

Oh hells yeah I did!!

We went with a theme based on one particularly challenging day with Piper:

World- Meet Darth Piper and Yod-ie

Clearly Yod-ie was less then thrilled with his lot in this moment.

Probably because his outfit was the wrong size altogether. (my fault)

This moment of peaceful accord between these two mortal enemies only lasted about 2 minutes. And there was some coaxing involved. I had to promise both of them I'd use the force to keep a squirrel in the yard long enough for a really good chase session*.

But the moment DID happen, and there is photographic evidence.

The Rage is caused in both dogs only lasted a moment. They have since moved on. It's nice when archnemises... archnemisi? bad guys can overcome their difference if only for a moment. 

Ah, revenge is sweet.....

*no squirrels were harmed in the staging of this photo.

Vandalism

The other night as we were sitting watching TV post dinner, a little criminal committed another crime. I mean, calling it a crime is a bit of a stretch really, since it was mainly only his stuff that was affected. Of course, I had to clean it up, I'm the one with thumbs and all.

Ah, the joy of thumbs.
Never ending.

Take a look for yourself:

As you can see, he upended the toy box and knocked everything out all by himself.

When he was done there was literally no toys left inside the box as they were strewn around the living room. I'm not sure what motivated him to do this, as he's never done it before, but it seemed like he got curious and then overjoyed.

His sister sat quietly, for a time chewing on her feet (she does that, thanks long haired dog allergies!) and then mainly just laying on a pillow. He just enjoyed the pleasure of being surrounded by all his toys at once. Using one of them at a time, but getting to them all in turn.

We laughed a good bit over it- it was entertaining to watch our tiny fella get industrious- even if it did make a giant mess of the living room. I tried to clean it all up twice, but he just kept repeating the process- he clearly knew what he wanted.

I thought it was a quirky thing that he did, and would likely never do it again.

The past 3 nights in a row he's repeated the process.
This was 2 nights later

Notice the pride?
Or at the very least the utter lack of concern for his behavior?

Yeah, he's pretty pleased with the situation.

He finds some sort of satisfaction in pulling things out one at a time and then flinging them throughout the room. And really, who wouldn't- it looks like tons of fun.

I'm actually shocked at Piper's lack of involvement in the entire thing. She has yet to help or intrude on it. She has taken a toy to play with, but never one that Odie is using at the time, and if he wants it back, she doesn't put up much of a fight (unless she wants him to chase her as a new game). She mainly just sits nearby and does her own thing. If you look really closely at the above picture, she's just licking her feet again. That's awesome.

The new challenge has become how to let the little monster have his fun without living in the toy aisle of a poorly cared for pet store. Some of these toys had never been looked at twice until this- and now he's in love with them all. It's another step closer to having an actual child- he throws toys all over, and I go around picking them up again. Hey, as long as he never becomes a belligerent teenager I'm ok with it all.

For now, I'll keep laughing at his "sneaky" ways and pick up the toys every night before bed. Maybe if we work hard on it, we can teach Piper to put the toys away and start a REALLY fun game.

For us.

Carbo Loading

I will start by saying this is clearly entirely my fault. I should have known that something I've done hundreds of times with no ill result would naturally be a problem this one time. I hang my head with the shame of it all.

On Second thought- Damn those damn dogs.

As usual, here's the back story-
Every once in a while we get a loaf of "fancy" bread from the grocery store bakery. It's a focaccia with cheese and olives, and it tastes amazingly good with oil & vinegar. We don't get it often because it's a loaf of bread that we don't really NEED, but sometimes you gotta splurge a little.

Since life has been stressful the past few weeks, and I had to run into the store after work to grab a couple of things last night, I grabbed a loaf of the "fancy" bread as a treat. Last night we both enjoyed some of it and I am gonna go out on a limb (speaking for my husband wise) and say we were eager to enjoy it again over the next few nights. I wrapped it up in its plastic and a towel to keep it fresh, on the counter as I have done 100 times over.

Who can see this coming?
You over there?
Everyone?
Yeah....

Chapter 2 starts this morning
I woke up with the assistance of Piper- she does enjoy standing up on the side of the bed RIGHT as my alarm goes off to make doubly sure I've heard it. That way I'll get out of bed faster and take her on the walk.... oh and her brother too....
Well, I got up, used the bathroom to wake up a bit, and when I opened the door, Piper was laying on the floor, and immediately rolled over and gave me her tummy for a rub. I thought to myself- Wow, she's being really great this morning, normally she bouncing and running and making me insane. Then Odie came over and snuggled up too, so they both got a few moments of petting they don't normally get.

Normally, they are running around like their butts are on fire eager to be taken out (even though they have a door to the backyard and can go out any time they want). There is a lot of bouncing and some moments of me being punched in the butt by Piper's enthusiasm. Normally, they are high energy and all over the place and generally making me want to get back in bed.

The lack of normal behavior should have been my clue something was up. The fact that I missed that can only be blamed on groggy brain having just woken up.

I walked into the main room to get the gear for our walk, when I stumbled onto an empty plastic bag. A quick glance over and I saw a towel on the floor as well.

Yeap, the plastic bag and towel that had contained 3/4 of a loaf of 'Fancy' bread.

Neither had so much as a crumb of bread in it at this moment.
Not
One
Crumb

I'm pretty sure the sound that came out of me at this point sounded something like: "WHATTHEHELLDIDYOUPEOPLEDO? WHYDOYOUKEEPDOINGTHIS? WHATISWRONGWITHYOU?"
None of that was useful, of course. Both dogs hit the floor, ears back, faces full of guilt as I cleaned up.

Note the "please don't kill me" tails that are wagging.....

After some deep cleansing breaths I got them geared up and out on their walk. Normally they get some treats as part of our daily training that happens during walks. (yes at 6:30 in the morning I'm doing training. Every day. Every damn day. Yep.) No treats today- verbal praise only. The last thing either one of these miscreants needed was more caloric intake.

As I worked through my frustration while we walked, I had to remind myself of the plus side of my criminals. Things like "no one has peed in the house anytime recently." and "At least it wasn't anything toxic this time" or "They are really sweet when they are sleeping together on the pillow". By the time we got home I had worked through the worst of my desire to bonk them on the head.

For the next hour or so of me getting ready for work, eating and watching the news Both dogs avoided me. Piper went to sleep under the table- which she never does- and Odie hid on this couch. I was thinking "aw, poor kiddos think I'm still mad" but then while I was driving to work I realized- they were in a carb induced food coma!

They had eaten an ENTIRE loaf of bread (essentially) between the 2 of them- it would be like eating a giant bowl of pasta for a person. Then they'd walked on a pretty warm morning with few breaks (I was determined to make them work a bit) and they were totally zonked out. If they had been people they would have unbuttoned their pants and said things like "ugh... why did I do that?"

For the amount they ate, I should really make them run a marathon when I get home- they'll certainly have enough carbohydrates in their systems to sustain the energy expense.

The Great Grape Adventure

This morning, I had a morning that will live in infamy.

Seriously, this one will go down as one of the greats.

Slight amount of background- The Hubs leaves for work every day at 5:30am and I usually sleep through that and get up around 6:30am, walk the pups for a while, then shower and get ready for the day. We've got this down to a routine that we can all deal with. Most days, the time the Hubs is awake and getting ready to go the dogs split their time- OD (the small kiddo) either stays in bed, or moves out to the couch in the office, where he snuggles under a blanket. Piper will wander about, following her Boy and getting pets on the head until he leaves, then she tries to wake me up by standing up on the side of the bed, then gives up and gets back in bed until my alarm goes off. Yes, she understands the alarm and that it means I am awake and moving. Crazy.

This morning, The Hubs came in to say good bye- I grunted some sort of loving word-like noises at him, and then he left. Within about 5 minutes, OD was standing up on BOTH sides of the bed to try and get my attention. I ignored it, thinking he was just being hopeful. He left and got on his couch. A beat or 2 later, my muddled mind realized I hadn't heard Piper in a while (silence is the first sign of trouble), So I perked up and listened.

I heard rustling. The sound of Feet landing heavy. More rustling.

Oh crap
Not good.

I get up and head out to the main rooms, and as  I leave the bedroom, Piper comes around the corner, walking so hunkered down she was practically crawling....

oh crap
not good.

I look in the kitchen and see a plate on the floor. I wrestle with my sleep addled brain and then realize- GRAPES! I had left some grapes out on the counter the night before.

She had pulled down the plate, picked the grapes OFF the stem (she's so delicate) and eaten maybe 15 LARGE green grapes.

Now, in case anyone doesn't know- and apparently not many do- grapes (and even more so, raisins) are toxic to dogs- they can cause renal failure and death. Some dogs are more sensitive then others, and the exact chemical cause remains unknown.

I knew this. I also knew that Piper has survived MANY incidents with the toxic chocolate in her day. I wasn't panicked at all, but I knew I wasn't going back to sleep. I grabbed my phone and got in bed to research what had to happen next.

As per usual when you research medical things on line- most of the information was VERY fatalistic. I found one article that was more even in tone, so  decided to listen to that one. Basically, it told me what COULD happen, and what to look out for, but also what I could do to help. There was one very simple thing I could do to help make sure her system rejected as much of it as possible.

Make her Barf.

Oh great. It's 5:40 am on a Thursday and my main goal in life for the next while would be to cause dog barf to happen. Oh joy!

I grab the hydrogen peroxide (look up information before using this- there is a specific weight to amount ratio, and it can easily be overdone and therefore dangerous) a spoon and a cup, and I make the dog come outside with me.

I apply the first amount and wait with her, in my pajamas, in the predawn-ish, to see if she'll vomit, and if she does what will be in it.

ugh, are you kidding me?

15 minutes later, we got nothing. So application # 2 is done- and let me tell you, she was less then thrilled about this the second time. I can't imagine why- I'm sure it tastes soooo good.......

I move her onto the driveway- a fenced in area where I can see more of what she's doing since there's no grass to hide in.
Within 5 minutes we had liftoff. We had liftoff all over the damn place. Every color and texture of liftoff you could possible handle at 6:05 in the morning. I got to inspect it even.

As far as I could tell, we had gotten all of it, or at least the vast majority of it, out of her system. I sat with her for a while out there, waiting for the effects of the peroxide to wear off. Those effects are as unpleasant to witness as they are to experience, I would wager. While I was waiting, I hear a little scratching at the door. OD is sad he's been alone for so long and wants to come out. At this point I figure what the hell and let him join in the fun. He's more interested in hunting rodents in our ivy anyway.

After about 20 more minutes, I figure the worst of it is over, so we all go inside. Mistake. Within 5 minutes of being inside, round 3 starts up, and now I'm cleaning the carpet. EVERYONE OUT- the dogs got locked in the back yard, and I got to cleaning. Eventually, the vets off ice opened, and I called in our little experience- an hour later the Vet called me back and let me know she thought everything would be fine since I got the barfing happening so quickly. Pat on my back for barf timing!

The second question- WHEN would the barfing stop? 'Cause I have to go to work eventually.... By 3 hrs, we should be in the clear? Ok, great, I can work with that- a tiny bit late to work was worth it.

I should note- through ALL of this mess, Piper stayed her attention starved moonie-eyed self. She just wanted to be with me the entire time, even when I was practically throwing her outside mid- vomit. Her sweet disposition just doesn't change for anything when she's home with us. No matter what the circumstance. You have to admire that just a little bit.

So a few hours, and a lot of vomit later and everything was cleared up. We'll keep an eye on her for a couple of days, but it looks like we're most likely in the clear at this point. If we see any signs of odd behavior or changes in eating/ drinking habits we'll rush her to the Dr, but for now she seems to be doing fine.

As for me, I don't know what will happen now, I'm tired, for sure, but now I'll be so paranoid to be asleep when The Hubs leaves for work in the morning.... I think I have a new alarm for a few days....

Assault with hot acid

So, of my 2 kids, the majority of the .... quirks belong to Piper. She had the rougher start to life, and is therefore saddled with more of the emotional and developmental baggage. Poor nutter.

There is one thing though, that belongs entirely to Odie.
Water

He is TERRIFIED of water. In all forms, at all times, for all reasons.

I use the same joke all the time, He seems to think it's hot hot acid that will burn and kill him slowly. Every time he hears water coming from whatever source he takes off like his ass is on fire, to hide deep in the depths of whatever blanket he can find. If I am holding him and dare to walk towards a water source (sink, shower, hose) he will start to breathe differently, his body goes stiff and he tries to climb up and over me to get away from it- even when the water is OFF.

He is totally mental.

The most entertaining, and frustrating, moment of dealing with this is when it's raining out and its time for a walk. Now, my little criminal is always game for a walk- he'll even hang in on a long hike that his little legs are struggling to keep up with. So we'll get him all geared up and open the door, only to see his face change completely from "YAY! WALK!" to "OH DEAR GOD WE'RE ALL GOING TO DIE!" He has been known to try to back out of his collar in an effort to not be scalded by the acid falling from the sky in the worlds attempt to kill him specifically.

'Cause you know, that happens.

I can't help but laugh every time. I know I shouldn't cause it's open mockery of his terror, but I can't help it. The same thing he runs to drink at the end of every day could also kill him if it touches him on the outside? It just defies logic. His face when he's that scared is just so damn cute too. It's hilarious.

When it's raining out, and we're going for a walk, I notice all the more the individual nature of each of my creatures.
Odie, convinced he's going to die, does his best to run between raindrops or rush to every protected spot on the path.
Piper reminds me of the kids who run out in galoshes specifically to jump in puddles. She loves it and/or doesn't even notice it.

Every now and again, she will pick up on Odie's panic and balk at going out, but if we do everything fast enough for her to not notice, she's game for getting wet and smelling new smells and getting wet again. It's so enthusiastic and adorable, it's hard not to laugh just as much at her as I am at Odie's sheer terror.

On regular days, it's just good to know if I ever want a moments peace I just turn on the water. Brushing my teeth sends him running. Washing my hands practically has him on the ceiling. The Hubs changing the water in the fish tank nearly has him at the emergency vet's office.

Good thing for him his master, The Hubs, has an irregular amount of sympathy for him and consoles him constantly. Also good for him the power of a blanket over the head really does work to block out the evil acid. Between those 2 things, he's protected, and we're very careful not to mess with that. The game isn't fun if there's no safe zone, after all.

Forever!

Oh my god it's been forever since I updated here. I'm sure my mother is terribly disappointed in me- HI Mom! Sorry!

My criminals have been growing up and finding more and more time to behave themselves worked into our days. It might not be as ample for writing, but it sure is nice to live with. We have started a refresher training course for Piper, so I'm sure there will be more material from that Soon.

I do have one thing to write about- So i'll do that right now, but I wanted to take a second to recognize the time lapse, and let you know I'm thinking about it, and working on it

Sorry mom!

International Law

I just took my first, real, grown up trip to Europe.

We went to Italy for a week, hitting Rome and Naples/ Pompeii (which is spelled Pompei in Italy, BTW- and yet Spell check keeps saying NO YOU'RE WRONG).

Of course, because The Hubs and I are both unapologetic dog people, we spent much of the trip pointing out local dogs to each other.

Yes, it went as you imagine. We're standing next to ruins of buildings that were built in like 4000 BC and going "babe- chihuahua in a jacket!" "Aw, So cute!"

Because that is how we vacation.

yeah, I know.

Anyway, it was interesting to see how italians treat their dogs differently. It was different even between the 2 cities. Being a foreigner I was able to seperate myself and take note of it all, and try to take away something as well.

The only time we saw dogs in jackets, was in Rome. There are dogs who live and are cared for in Pompeii's ruins- they have been there for generations and continue to be part of the local lore. Naples was a more gritty relationship to dogs, no jackets, but still a part of the fabric of the city.

Overall the breeds we saw most commonly were Jack russell/ Fox terriers and german Shephards. I was SHOCKED as they are both demanding breeds who require a good bit of exercise to be happy, and we were in areas that are most definitely CITY. There were also some chihuahuas and mutts and retriever mixes.

I wondered how these folks do it, cause there's not a lot of green space available, and the apartments have to be pretty tiny. Then I realized something- these people take their dogs EVERYWHERE with them. I saw dogs enter grocery stores, pharmacies and restaurants. One night as we ate dinner outside, we looked into the interior of the restaurant to see a bichon sitting at a table, waiting for her mother to finish dinner. Like, sitting up on the chair, face table height (when she wasn't lying down) off leash like a person waiting. NO one flinched. No one even minded when said dog got down and walked around the restaurant. They just stepped over her, or shooed her out of the way, and she moved, and it was no big deal.

If that happened in the US, the place would be closed down for health violations and the owner would never open a food establishment again.

Now, this dog never used the place as a toilet, she never licked anything, she never blocked a doorway or tripped anyone. She knew her place and was never demanding attention from anyone. She was just living in the space with her mom, each doing their own thing.

I never saw people bending down to pet other peoples dogs, but I did see folks respecting the space a dog was in. It was almost as if the dogs were as much a part of society as the people around them. You don't stare at passerby, you just know they are there, and take note of them soas to not walk into them. The leashes were always long enough for the dog to walk comfortably, but not so long as to be very far away from the human on the other end. They never had more then a foot or 2 of leeway.

The only bouncy jumpy dog I saw on leash was a puppy. Like 4 months old most likely puppy. They can't help being bouncy, it's part of puppy-ness. Everyone else would just walk politely and stop and start according to the person they were with. They were treated as DOGS, and they reacted in kind.

We even walked the Dog park in Rome ('cause I am such a nerd I wanted to see a roman dog park.... Yes, I know.) and saw them all running around and playing. There were no real fights, and only one dog acted a fool that we saw, and ironically he was owned by an American expat. They all came when called.... within the first few calls anyway. They all played well and never left the vague boundaries of the park.

In Naples, there were more homeless folks with their dogs, and a more urban attitude overall. A couple of strays walking around and such. Again, the dogs were just there, a part of life that everyone saw and acknowledged, but didn't fuss over. Again the dogs were calm, well behaved and pretty healthy.

What I took away from it (and hopefully its not too late to apply this to my kids) is that if you state the expectation, set them up to achieve it and then just let them be dogs- chances are you will end up with a well balanced animal in your life. Take them out into the world, let them be part of the every day life, don't fuss, don't bother, just have them there.

Here is the US we tend to make sure a deal about our BABIES and their needs.... which we've put onto them the majority of the time. They mainly need food, play, affection, warmth, room to roam and guidelines for behavior. Once they have that, everything else is what we decide for them. No dog NEEDS to eat organic steak and carrots every night... trust me, wait long enough with the kibble out, and eventually they'll eat it. We've fussed over them so much that we've lost sight of the dogness of it all.

So, the italian lifestyle taught me things, not only about myself, but about dogs. La Dolca Vita is really just being a part of your loved ones world, but still retaining what makes you unique- be you dog or human. When you have that, everything else falls into place.

Also, the food was amazing.

Which has nothing to do with dogs but is totally true.

A Smell by Any Other Name

It's been a while since I've updated here. I have no excuses beyond being uncertain of anyone reading this AND just life in general.

Recently, one of our in home criminals added a new crime to her list. It was an Assault on the senses caused by her own misdeeds.

Basically, Piper's habit of getting into and eating really inappropriate things (the latest additions to this are a sharpie, a highlighter and sticks!) have caused her system to get junked up, and her anal glands have reacted in due course.

A couple of months ago, we noticed she was getting extra stinky in a way we hadn't experienced before. After a few days, it had gotten so bad I was convinced there was something wrong and we headed into the vet's office. It turned out her anal glands had become impacted.

I had the joy and pleasure of being in the room when they drained her glands out. If you have never had the pleasure of smelling that, let me tell you- DON'T DO IT! It is a smell that you retain for hours. It haunts you for a couple of days on and off. It goes way beyond a normal gland drain that the groomer might do that has a slight aroma to it. This is WAY bigger and MUCH grosser.

Just as a Tidbit of info- the groomer can work with the glands from the outside- the Dr gets all up in there and drains the hell out of it. Even the Doctor agreed with me when I said to her "this must be one the least enjoyable parts of the job".

By the time the glands have gotten full enough and infected enough to become impacted, things have taken a really gnarly turn for the animal. Our poor girl had been worrying at her glands for days, and we hadn't noticed how bad it had gotten until the smell started to invade the entire house. Fortunately, we got her in before it ruptured, and got her on her antibiotics. She LOVES taking pills because there's peanut butter involved, and bless her heart she doesn't look past that to find the pill inside.

We got her through her treatment cycle, get her better, and changed her diet slightly to up her fiber levels, hoping that would help her system stay in the reset position. We were doing really well for a while. She hadn't gotten into anything and eaten bathroom items, or office supplies. It all added up to a healthy girl for a few months.

Then she ate a marker. Then we ran out of her diet supplement (canned pumpkin!). Then time to eat a highlighter. Then the smell started to come back.... So, yet again I had to drag her into the vet's office to get her glands drained. Fortunately this time we caught it just when the glands were just full, not impacted.

It's so frustrating, because if she just didn't do the one thing, she wouldn't have to deal with the other. I mean, come ON- a highlighter can't possibly taste that good. It just can't.

The price we have to pay is a truly stinky dog. When her glands start to become an issue, the smell is something that can't be denied or ignored. her crimes send us all to a level of punishment. Granted our punishment is much easier then hers, no one is stinking their fingers anywhere on us- it's just a smell.

Now, if we could just convince Piper that eating writing implements or anything in the 'lotion' category is a bad idea, regardless of how yummy it may smell, we'll be much happier overall.